• I'm simply not there //
  • Casey 18 RVA Light Sleeper; Heavy Dreamer

    Every night, I look up at the freckled sky and fall in love with the universe all over again.

    I will be counting the stars for the rest of my life.

    I'm a little eccentric, and a little naive. //
  • Archive
  • / inside my mind
  • / Inquire
  • /
  • / Theme
1286 ♥
0 ♥
Do you feel it when someone stops being enamored with you? 
Is it like a random bout of sadness that comes out of nowhere? 
Like subconsciously grieving for lost affection. 
21334 ♥
2703 ♥
22681 ♥
184 ♥
I really didn’t realize how much I was hurting over Ken until I saw this picture. 
Honestly, I don’t think it really hit home that he’s passed on until I saw this, and now it’s hitting me harder than it has since we found he had moved on. 
I guess seeing a picture of him and realizing that this happy-go-lucky, wonderful human being is actually gone has taken that sheen of disbelief from my eyes. 
I know I should be elated that he’s not in any more pain, but damn if this isn’t the worst. 
I’m teetering on the thought that I’m not fully crying over the fact that he’s gone though, because he was in a lot of pain, and he had been for a very long time, and even though he was a trooper and he kept a smile on throughout the entire ordeal, we all knew that he was struggling. 
I’m crying over the fact that Debbie is now alone. 
When his soul escaped his body, her happiness escaped her life, and I don’t know how she’s going to go on. He was her best friend, her lover, her fiancee and the man that helped her get her world spinning again. Now that he’s gone, I just don’t know how she’s going to fare without him. 
I keep thinking about how she wasn’t able to be with him when he died too. She was in the room, right beside him, but his son’s toddler decided to start screaming and making a fuss and when Debbie tried to get them to remove the kid from the room, it’s mom started screaming and during her shit fit of a temper tantrum, he took his final breath. 
Debbie’s back was turned on him as he died, and I guess I’m just putting myself in her shoes. 
She didn’t get to hold his hand, she didn’t get to touch his face, she didn’t get to watch him pass, and that might be one of the most sickeningly sad things that I’ve ever heard.
I’m thinking about her now though, sleeping alone in their bed in an empty house that used to be theirs, smelling his clothes for his scent, waking up to hear his monitors but hearing nothing. 
The silence in that home now, must be deafening. 
1 ♥

I was talking to Aahad tonight about how I toss around the idea of our realities being like a book, which is a pretty strange and tough thing to explain to someone, so bear with me while I try and explain it to you as best as I can.

If you even take the time to read this. It is 2:30 in the morning, so if you scroll past and don’t bother to read, oh well, BUT if you happen to stop in and check this out, I hope it gives you a really neat thing to think about, and maybe even some really awesome dreams, too? 

Onward to story time! 

So, as you guys all know, (or at least I think you know, or I hope you know?) I love thinking, researching, hypothesizing and creating my own ideas and thoughts about the world around me. I have always had these really off the wall ideas about life and reality, parallel universes, past lives, reincarnation and everything in between, but recently, I’ve been dwelling on the thought that maybe, and stick with me here, maybe, our world, our reality or our perception is like one thin page of a very large chapter book.

With each page though, comes different parallels and universes laid on top of each other, page after page to form this strange book full of life(lives).  

Not only that though, but I’ve been thinking hard on the thought that we are all combined, almost like one entity together. 

Who knows, I could write a book about my random ramblings. 

2 ♥
246 ♥
If I could have this with Freddy Krueger and Nancy Thompson toppers on the cake, my life would be complete.
For real though, if I could have that as a wedding cake, that would be INCREDIBLE. 
A horror movie themed wedding? That would be perfect. (<—-oh yeah, by the way, like this) 
164 ♥
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Older →